For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
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