so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
why didn't you poke me back
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
