You're completely useless in the revolution.
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize