I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
God I need to hump something, right now.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
