i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
