$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Randomize
