we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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