There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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