You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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