Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Randomize
