Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
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