Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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