: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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