Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
