is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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