4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
