sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Randomize
