I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
