you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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