He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I got her a Nickelback box set.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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