the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
if i died would you start the facebook group?
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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