whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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