my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Randomize