Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
