i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
