Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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