..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Randomize