what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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