Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
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