Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
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