So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
