Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
