You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
