It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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