help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
