he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
