Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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