I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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