I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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