Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
