i permit you to call me
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
