uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
