if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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