Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
