Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize