maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Randomize
