Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
