he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Fuck me I smell like cheese
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
