I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
youre lurking in front of me
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
You pole danced in your parka.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize