Non-Jews are for practice
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
