theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
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