Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Randomize